We recently came to a point where we were confronted with the fact that something has to change. In short, we have more financial obligations than we can pay for, and there isn’t a whole lot we can do about it. Downsizing/moving isn’t an option. We could try bankruptcy, but that wouldn’t address our income shortfall. I need to at least get a new job, and probably get a second job. That puts us in the position of being on the job hunt. That is never a fun place to be, or at least it never has been.
After a couple days and some time talking, it started to become clear that I have been operating under the effects of depression for quite some time, probably about 10 years. It really became clear when I found a job posting that sounds ideal, but I never could bring myself to updating my resume or applying.
Trying to find answers and direction in what to do to address the problem led me to the idea that depressed individuals tend to have a negative outlook and a negative inner dialogue. I might be described as being pessimistic, and I do see a lot of negative in others, myself especially. I think dealing with that might subconsciously be at the heart of my recent post about my smile experiment.
While taking some time last night to think about strategies and plans, I thought something that might help is to blog some of the things that have helped me dig this hole I’m trying to extract myself from. I have decided to spend some time putting my thoughts and experiences to virtual paper to help me sort it out.
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